MMMiii!

If a parent is the one spying on their own teenager, would it be stalking?

I was clicking some links and it led me to this website that sold gadgets and stuff for spying on teens — from teen driving, their locations, drug tests, even key logging and intercourse!

Of course I think it is absurd, but then I am of a different period. With all the technology and harmful websites around, not to mention the preexisting peer pressure and “surroundings”, I wouldn’t doubt that some parents WOULD start doubting their own children.

In my time, my mother trusted me enough that even if I went home at 2 in the morning, she knew where I was and she just expected me to be home by morning. I didn’t have a computer at home during my teenage years (though I had internet access) and I didn’t drive (I still don’t). If I’m not at school or at home, I’m either at an internet cafe or at some friend’s house, sometimes at the mall. I didn’t own a cellphone either.

Now, every kid has a cellphone, almost every teen seems to own a car, kids in the US have easy access to drugs, every kid has a computer and so on. Wouldn’t parents freak out?

Even toys, handheld game consoles now can become an instrument for stalkers, that parents might want to keep their kids away from that. (Google search: Nintendo DS Child Molester)

Parents who really care might think that they do this “spying” because they care about their kids. After all, like for driving accidents, a lot of these involve teens.

AND then there’s cyber bullying, or “harmful” websites. I know of some stories where a parent found out about her child’s going to one of the famous image boards, and she banned him from using the computer. Although I find that a pretty amazing story, some parents started thinking about closely monitoring their children’s online activity–websites, chat, and so on.

OKay, so the parents will be doing all these because they think of their children’s safety… but wouldn’t this also be an invasion of privacy? Aren’t teens supposed to have privacy anymore? Don’t they trust their kids? — This is my side as a former teen. I couldn’t even imagine my mother finding out what things I’ve been doing when I was a teen.

As a parent (being a teacher makes me like a second parent to about 60 kids right now), of course I’d be scared for my kids. I might want to know where they are every second, every minute, I might want to know what they do when they’re online and everything… I wouldn’t want them to be a target of Anonymous.
But I think it all boils down to this: If you don’t trust them, if you’re suspicious of them, then do it– spy on them. But if you know they’re really good kids, or if you KNOW you raised them up well, don’t do it. They might just hate you in the end.

It’s like when I’m giving a quiz and I’m suspecting some kids to be cheating. I either make them change seats (OR ELSE THEIR QUIZ WILL BE INVALIDATED, SCORE=0) or I stay near them throughout the duration of the quiz. If you trust them, let them be. If you don’t, monitor them.

So… my question is …

If the one spying on the kid (teen) is the parent, would it be stalking?

If you enjoyed this post, make sure you subscribe to my RSS feed!