MMMiii!

I’m suddenly in the election mood. I might go out on Monday and cast my vote after all.

Read this. It’s good. :D

*OLD VERSION*: The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house  and laying up supplies for the winter.

The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the  summer away. Come winter, the ant is warm and well fed. The grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold.  MORAL OF THE STORY: Be responsible for yourself!

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*MODERN VERSION:* The ant works hard in the withering heat all summer long, building his house  and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks the ant is a fool and laughs and dances and plays the  summer away.

Come winter, the shivering grasshopper calls a press conference and demands  to know why the ant should be warm and well fed while others are cold and  starving.

CBS, NBC, PBS, CNN, and ABC show up to provide pictures of the shivering  grasshopper next to a video of the ant in his comfortable home with a table  filled with food. America is stunned by the sharp contrast.

How can this be, that! in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is  allowed to suffer so?

Kermit the Frog appears on Oprah with the grasshopper, and everybody cries  when they sing, “It’s Not Easy Being Green.”

Jesse Jackson stages a demonstration in front of the ant’s house where the  news stations film the group singing, “We shall overcome.” Jesse then has  the group kneel down to pray to God for the grasshopper’s sake.

Nancy Pelosi & John Kerry exclaim in an interview with Larry King that the  ant has gotten rich off the back of the grasshopper, and both call for an  immediate tax hike on the ant to make him pay his fair share.

Finally, the EEOC drafts the Economic Equity and Anti-Grasshopper Act  retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The ant is fined for failing to  hire a proportionate number of green bugs and, having nothing left to pay  his retroactive taxes, his home is confiscated by the government.

Hillary gets her old law firm to represent the grasshopper in a defamation  suit against the ant, and the case is tried before a panel of federal judges  that Bill Clinton appointed from a list of single-parent welfare recipients.

The ant loses the case.

The story ends as we see the grasshopper finishing up the last bits of the  ant’s food while the government house he is in, which just happens to be the  ant’s old house, crumbles around him because he doesn’t maintain it. The ant has disappeared in the snow. The grasshopper is found dead in a drug  related incident and the house, now abandoned, is taken over by a gang of  spiders who terrorize the once peaceful neighborhood.

MORAL OF THE STORY: Be careful how you vote

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